Dapperly Odd Parent
by Fangalicous08
Summary: Kurt Hummel is, frankly, a miserable child. But can his new Fairy God Parent help him? FOP/Glee Crossover. Oneshot for now. R&R?


So, on Tumblr this lovely person known as Rainasinbow (and known here as **i am fangluvr**) came up with this idea of doing a crossover of Glee and Fairly Odd Parents. Welp, I just so happened to cross by this idea and nicely stole it from her. XD The idea to do this crossover is all her, everything that actually happens is from my brain.

**We don't wanna, we don't wanna be sued. We're not tryin', tryin' to be rude. So here's my disclaimer: **I don't own FOP, nor do I own Glee. I also don't own StarKidPotter, or that darn crocodile that keeps eating parents and cutting kids. Someone needs to get it's license plate number. :P

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><p>Kurt Hummel looked down at his feet, leaning his head against the mop in his hands.<p>

_This is stupid_, he thought. _Grown ups are supposed to do this. I'm a kid; I'm supposed to be outside having fun and playing with the other kids. _

Sue, Kurt's babysitter, walked into the kitchen, purposefully pouring her drink onto the floor. "You missed a spot, Porcelain. These floors aren't going to mop themselves." Sue cackled as she returned to the living room. She sat down in the recliner and kicked her feet up, flipping the television channel. Kurt glared at her back as she left the kitchen. Kurt hated her; she was the cruelest, most evil person he knew. He threw the mop down on the floor, running up to his bedroom with tears in his eyes.

Kurt hated crying, but he just couldn't help it. It had only been a few months since his mother had passed away when her car crashed, now his father worked two jobs and left him here with this nasty woman babysitting him. Kurt had tried to tell him many times just how evil Sue was, but he wouldn't hear it.

"You just have to give her a chance." His father continued to tell him. "She just has to warm up to people, Kurt. You'll get along soon enough."

Kurt's hands curled up into fists as he rubbed his eyes hard. He grabbed a pillow, covering his face and letting out a shrill scream. His screams turned into sobs, which slowly softened to silent tears. Kurt lay quietly on his bed for a while, curled up and clutching a pillow to his chest. All the good had been taken out of his life, his mother, his father's attention, his friends. Now all he had was Sue, the evil babysitter. He could hear the TV downstairs as she watched some show about singing kids.

Kurt was suddenly very aware of someone standing at the end of his bed, their eyes peeping over the top of the blankets. Kurt sat up quickly, using the pillow as a shield of sorts. The hazel eyes peeping over the bed met his from under a mop of curly black hair.

"Wh-who are you?" Kurt asked, his voice a higher pitch than usual. The eyes seemed to light up as they moved upward, revealing the rest of a face and soon a body that…was floating a good three feet above the ground.

"Hi!" The mysterious floating person said cheerily. He held a stick with a glowing yellow star on top of it in one hand, and it looked as if he had a crown floating over his head. "My name's Blaine, and I'm your _FAIRY GODPARENT!_" He said the last two words with emphasis as two large glowing words appeared in the air behind his head. Kurt's mouth dropped open.

"I cried myself to sleep again didn't I?" He muttered. Blaine shook his head.

"No, silly goose, you're not sleeping! This is real." The black haired boy floated towards Kurt, coming down to sit on the end of his bed. "My name is Blaine Cosma. And I'm here because, frankly, you're a miserable child."

"But, you were just floating. And…what are you?" Kurt asked, beyond bewildered. "What's a 'fairy godparent'?"

"Basically, I do whatever you want me to do." Blaine told him, the grin never leaving his face. "I'm magical, see." He held up his wand as if to prove his point. "I'm a fairy, and as a fairy I get assigned to a miserable child. I'm supposed to make you happy with my amazing and undeniably dapper magic skills."

"You're a…fairy?" Kurt asked, astonished. "You're really a fairy?"

"Yes, haven't we been over this? Do you want my complete history?" Blaine seemed to tire of explaining himself to the boy. Kurt nodded slightly. Blaine flicked his wand, which let out a harsh glow, and a chart appeared in mid-air. Kurt looked around the chart, making sure there weren't any strings attached. Not that it'd matter if there were, that wouldn't explain it suddenly appearing like that. Blaine used his wand to point to a picture of a lady with green hair piled atop her head.

"This is my grandma, Mama Cosma." He told Kurt. "She is a fairy, the oldest one I know actually. She and her husband, who has never been mentioned in the entirety of my history, had this boy." He moved his wand down to a man with green hair and eyes to match. "His name is Cosmo Cosma, and that's my dad. He married this woman," – the wand moved to a woman with pink eyes and swirly pink hair- "her name is Wanda, she's my mom. They fiddled around and ended up having me." He pointed to himself. "My actual name is Poof Fairywinkle Cosma. But, I changed my name, much my parents' disliking."

"They don't like the name Blaine?" Kurt asked. "I think it's a very nice name. And it fits you well, better than Poof."

"Yeah, they don't like a lot of things I do nowadays." Blaine told him, sitting down on the bed as the chart vanished. "Not that it really matters anymore."

"What do you mean?" Kurt asked curiously. He moved closer to the boy, though still cautious.

"They're dead." Blaine said nonchalantly. Kurt's mouth fell open again, mostly at how casual Blaine was with announcing his parents' death.

"What happened?" Kurt questioned, moving to hug the boy. Blaine accepted Kurt's hug and began to explain.

"You see, when I was a baby they were assigned to this kid named Timmy," he began. "Well, they got attached to this kid, and then he…grew up. And he didn't need them anymore. He got married, got a house, had amazingly happy kids. So the three of us went back to Fairy World. My dad decided he should get his Fairy License renewed, but on the way there we crashed. Into a crocodile."

Kurt looked up at the boy. "That's horrible."

"Yeah," Blaine nodded. "The crocodile ate my parents, then took out a knife and gave me this nasty scar." He held his arm out for Kurt to see the scar on his forearm. It looked like three tildes (that squiggly thing on the keyboard beside the one key) one on top of the other.

"It reminds me of bacon." Kurt said. Blaine shrugged.

"Yeah, well, what's your story?" He looked at the other boy, a good inch or two shorter than him.

"My mom…passed in a car crash about six months ago, now my daddy works two jobs and leaves me here with an evil babysitter that yells at me and makes me do chores all day." Kurt told him, frowning.

"Well, that's what I'm here for!" Blaine said excitedly, sliding off of the bed. He stood in front of Kurt, holding a hand out. "Why don't we go have some actual fun? You can wish up whatever you want."

Kurt stared at Blaine's hand for a minute before a smile crept across his face. He looked up at the other boy and nodded, taking his hand. Blaine took the mortal boy out to show him what real fun was, finally putting some happiness back into his life.

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><p>...yup. That just happened.<p>

R&R?


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